Picture of the Day
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December 6, 2002

about 60 earth years ago, on july 16, 1945, the first atomic bomb was exploded at alamogordo, NM. this was a momentous occasion. momentous because the scientists pushing the button (actually, throwing the lever, turning the key, electric chair or auto ignition) felt there was a chance that nuclear fission might set off a chain reaction combusting all the oxygen in the atmosphere. the sky would burn and all life on the surface would instantly perish. still, they threw the switch, guessing (correctly) that their experiemnt would not be the end of the world. (at least not that day.)


Two women were brought before King Solomon, both claiming to be the mother of an infant. Solomon declared that he would cut the baby in two and give each woman half. Neither objected to the plan. the scimitar was raised, descended, and neatly sliced the baby from crotch to skulltop. Now, said wise King Solomon, you must each wear half this child around your necks under pain of death. And it came to pass. Twenty years later, the mummified remains of the half-baby hung between the withered breasts of the surviving woman. She was working as a prostitue in a busy port, all her teeth long gone from drink and neglect; she was known for giving very good head. Just look for the wench with the dead baby around her neck, a sailor would suggest to his mate, but make no mention of it.


when the first atom bomb exploded in New Mexico, dosing generations of future Americans with radioactive fallout, it created a portal to another spacetime dimension, one which opened the earth up to casual invasion by roving alien bandits. the americans attempted to reach an agreement, assuming the invaders to represent a government, and thus be open to diplomatic negotiations. but the creatures were outlaws even in their own dimension, and, sensing they had the upper hand, decided to subjugate humanity. they sent landers to control the population, whose toil and suffering would provide them sustenance. these landers were called television by Earth's unwitting populace. they accepted it as reality and did whatever it told them. the aliens were pleased. assuming the form of humans, cared for by Earth doctors, the gangsters from afar ate whoever they wanted and feasted on human misery.


Some say that if the two baby halves were ever united, it would close the Alamogordo wormhole. I devoted my life to this search and am pleased to report that I found them. One was in a roadside freakshow tourist trap museum in tennessee, the other was mistaken for a depleted uranium shell casualty in the Persian Gulf War of 1991 A.D. I have brought the two pieces together using a very special thread, and almost immediately i perceive aliens (disguised as world leaders) slowly asphyxiating on TV. Additionally, the televisions themselves have begun to melt, leaving small piles resembling dried poodle feces. Snapping awake, the zombie slaves suddenly stand up, renounce professional sports, and head to the kitchen for dustpans to sweep up the remains. Then, proceeding outside, they set fire to their homes, automobiles, clothes, and trees. The flames leap, creating a planetwide firestorm which sucks all the oxygen out of the atmosphere; billions die in paroxysms of erotic strangulation. So much for good intentions. The end.
beautiful mofo day for the wisdom of cats
waiting for the bus, the pumps are idle for the moment
signs of life at pine st! drum kit and breakdancing.
jeremy sez they do without permission, the nearby
Gap (yuck!) glad b/c they "bring hella people"
"off the page" at SOIL (1318 E Pine),
sarah and others rif on the theme of 3-D narrative

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